When youre gone.

My last ever real smile ; ....thnks sam .

So, my 3 days at home sucks. Locked myself in my room. Believe me, i did not eat a thing the past 3 days.Each day my heart just hurts, day by day. Hey, im backing off. Its no use already if you wanna see who can melt your heart first.Obviously you have hated me.Trust me, i never did hate ya. I hate just myself, for not cherishing you and now, this hapenned.We lost everything, and by everything, i mean everything... i wish you luck with whoever you are gonna be with. Cause am nothing to you. I know that day by day that love is just fading for you, but me, you never know how many things ive already tried letting this pain go. I tried taking sleeping pills, still im not able to sleep. i tried shouting all my heart out, that did not work either. i tried reading all the messages you sent me before but that made me cry.Im suffering here, nobody know tht.

I was so bubbly and cheerful outside, but i was acting that out. This heart is aching too much that i cant think well.I feel like skipping tomorrow's POA paper..Seriously.Tears of losing him have gone, i cant go on crying cause i lost him.Now i can only cry cause i miss him alot.So much.

I never thought i could lose him by a month plus.Things were just gonna get better.The letter that i wanna give to him, i threw it away too. I was writing that on the second he asked fr a break up. Am confused love, im sry, im just used to calling you that, why must this happened?

The days felt like years when im alone, its totally is diffrent. I am changing, to a worst girl, i can feel it fr myself. Am starting my bad deeds again.God, why cant i just be knocked down by any vehicle and suffer frm a memory loss? i really want that.I really cannot take this anymore. I talked to my mum abt him, my mum was shocked, cause she told me she liked him and we could really pull things through. We would solve any ups and downs. But, i guess she was wrong.It happened that small fights broght us further.My mum wants to move soon, and am changing school probably.Too many things are on my mind right now. Should i waut fer him like he used to wait fr me? The answer to the question is YES. If we are really not fated then, probably everything was just my mistake frm the past.Babygees, im sorry i did not tell you abt me wanna move away.Im too hurt to be schooling there anymore, probably am moving far, and by far, i mean really far.Im frustrated by all the rumours coming, so frustrated. If you people wanna hurt ne that much, killing me would be the best aye? Sam, dont do anything too harsh on monday aye? I still love him, it hurts me so much. i dont know, whatever you guys wanna do to him, dont tell me. pls..im begging to you people out there not to talk about 349. It has ended. So soon.If things get worsen in school,im moving away fr good.I just wanna let you know, no matter where i am, who im with, or when, i am always thinking of you... ;

You said move on

Where do I go?

I guess second best

Is all I will know..

Cause when I'm with him,

I am thinking of you

Thinking of you

What you would do if

You were the one

Who was spending the night?

Oh I wish that I

Was looking into your eyes...

to him, i missed you alot..alot. Its been 2 days straight you did not text me up.

Its okay if you wanna avoid me, i just wanna say sorry.

Ps, i miss you love..(ex love)